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Aizen/Hinamori fanfic crack, art.

I was rereading some of my old fanfic favourites, and one of them inspired this.

Series: Bleach
Title: Conversations on a set
Pairing (of sorts): Aizen/Hinamori
Rating: PG-13 to be safe
Summary: Hinamori had one of the worst days of her professional life, the catering is reaching as of yet unplumbed depths, and meeting him doesn't exactly help. Pure crack. Spoilers for the end of the Soul Society arc.


"Hello, Aizen-sama. You don't mind, do you? I'm beat."

"Ah. Hello Hinamori. Long day?"

"Quite. I just had a nervous breakdown on your behalf. Although to be honest, only a complete imbecile could fall for that letter."

"Yes, well. I didn't have a lot to work with, exactly. So how did it go?"

"Perfectly. Everyone thinks I'm an idiot now. Of course, it's only going to get worse from here."

"True. I wish I could do something to make it easier."

"Never mind. Not your fault. Say, is your sandwich as soggy as mine?"

"Positively liquid. I hope they didn't try to use Mayuri as spread again."

"Yeah. Makes you wonder if they laugh at farting jokes, too. So, is Urahara still having trouble with that indigestion?"

"I'm afraid so. Tessai is not helping."

"No, he wouldn't be. Did you happen to see Nemu lately? She's even worse off than I am. I'm worried about her, you know. Last time I saw her, she was looking for a bucket. Limping something awful, poor thing."

"I see. She's looking a bit healthier now though."

"Oh. She was here?"

"Yes, a few hours ago. Although I have no idea what she would need the kerosene for."

"Hmmm. I can't begin to imagine. So she's better?"

"I am not sure about better. Determined, certainly. Well, this sandwich is a lost cause, Mayuri or not."

"Ditto."

"You wouldn't happen to have an extra napkin?"

"Here."

"Thank you. Soggy and greasy. What a combination."

"Terrible."

"Quite."

"..."

"... So, Hinamori-san, what would you do to me if the management had allowed you more than two braincells to rub together?"

"That a trick question?"

"Not at all. I'm curious. Besides, I still have some time to kill."

"Okay then. You know, that's actually an easy one. I would rip out your still beating heart and shove it down your throat along with your kidney, for starters. But it's not as if anybody actually asked me."

"I did, just now. And you could certainly try."

"Yeah, you're obscenely powerful. It's not fair."

"I can't complain. As much as it pains me, any attempt at kidney removal on your part would end up in a quick and painless death."

"A girl can dream."

"Nice fantasy, though. Quite vivid, and full of a certain raw power."

"Yeah, keeps me warm at night. And it's still not fair that you get to be evil and godlike and stuff and I don't even get a brain."

"Allow me to make it up to you? Over dinner?"

"More soggy sandwiches?"

"Gourmet food. Only the best for my enchanting vice-captain. That blush is charming, by the way."

"Lay it off, you're starting to sound like Kyouraku. And I wasn't blushing at all. It's the light. Anyway. Sorry, Aizen-sama, but I really don't like your glasses."

"Oh, I can take those off. No problem. See?"

"Wow. Did your hair just get shorter?"

"Never mind."

"Looks good."

"Thank you."

"Don't mention it."

"Wonderful. Friday evening then?"

"I didn't say yes."

"Possibly. You're blushing again, though."

"Darn."

"Honestly? I think it's charming."

"You are a cold fish of a homicidal megalomaniac. I shouldn't care what you think."

"It's part of my charm. And you do regardless."

"True. Okay, yes, if you insist. But make it tonight instead of Friday. I'm starved."

"My pleasure."


Also, for updated art check this: [Rebel without a cause]. I think I'm slowly getting a handle on his hair (about time, too). Full view recommended.

Comments

( 20 comments — Leave a comment )
kookie315
Sep. 3rd, 2005 03:03 pm (UTC)
Woe, he's hot. Who is he? It was beautifully done.
technoelfie
Sep. 3rd, 2005 03:09 pm (UTC)
An original main character in a manga I'm planning to do some time in the future when I decide I'm able to, y'know, draw. He's older in the manga than he is in the picture though. :)
kookie315
Sep. 3rd, 2005 03:27 pm (UTC)
That's origional? Awesome job with him! Oh yeah, your manga. I can't wait for that. :)
technoelfie
Sep. 5th, 2005 02:27 am (UTC)
It is indeed! I'm looking forward to drawing the manga too. :)
boopkit
Sep. 3rd, 2005 03:23 pm (UTC)
"Okay then. You know, that's actually an easy one. I would rip out your beating heart and shove it down your throat along with your kidney, for starters. But it's not as if anybody actually asked me."

YOU MADE MY DAY, DAMMIT!
ahahahahah
technoelfie
Sep. 5th, 2005 02:27 am (UTC)
*meow*

Glad you liked it! :D
myuki_chan
Sep. 3rd, 2005 03:40 pm (UTC)
This is such crack. I love it. ♥ XDXDXD
technoelfie
Sep. 5th, 2005 02:26 am (UTC)
Well, writing it was definitely fun. ^__^ And thanks!
nutty_scribbler
Sep. 3rd, 2005 09:01 pm (UTC)
GYAH.... I LOVE YOU...

This is so much crack love. :3
technoelfie
Sep. 5th, 2005 02:25 am (UTC)
*soaks up the love* There's more crack where this came from...
ex_rong
Sep. 3rd, 2005 09:34 pm (UTC)
MUAHAHA!!! I love it!!!
technoelfie
Sep. 5th, 2005 02:24 am (UTC)
I'm glad!
gekkou_hayate
Sep. 4th, 2005 08:04 am (UTC)
LMFAO. You would make Shakespeare cry (with envy?) with your use of puns.
OMGawd the puns.
Reading this killed off so much brain cells. XD
technoelfie
Sep. 5th, 2005 02:24 am (UTC)
Heh, thanks! ♥ I might do a sequel about the after-dinner shagging, in the same manner. Beacouse it's fun (for me, at any rate).
kisalen
Sep. 8th, 2005 11:12 am (UTC)
This is hilarious. I love it ^^
technoelfie
Sep. 15th, 2005 01:03 am (UTC)
Thank you! ♥
krigarinna
Sep. 14th, 2005 02:40 pm (UTC)
hey there, may i use some of your user pics on my lj? :3 of course i will put your name there so they know they are not mine.
technoelfie
Sep. 15th, 2005 01:01 am (UTC)
Depends on which ones. :) Some of them I made especially for my LJ, and I wouldn't like to share them.
krigarinna
Sep. 15th, 2005 02:22 am (UTC)
Okay :3 well it was only Bleach-omg, sakura – sad, Kakashi - living with ghosts which i was interested in. so is any of them something you did'nt want to share?
technoelfie
Sep. 15th, 2005 04:20 am (UTC)
The Bleach OMG one. The rest were made for sharing, so you can definitely have them. ^_^
( 20 comments — Leave a comment )